Change sucks. It really does, but I suppose that’s the way the world works. In the last ten years my life has changed massively – a lot of it for the worse. Looking at the previous year end posts I realised just how much we (as a family) have lost and how many facets to my life are missing now.
That’s not to say that I am wallowing in self pity, I am grateful for what I have. I realise that I have a good life and am alive and reasonably healthy. Looking at the recent Tsunami disaster puts things in perspective and makes me grateful for what I have. The horror of what these poor people experienced and are still suffering can only make you feel lucky.
Is it so wrong, however, to miss what you have lost? The last five years we have lost my Dad, my Nana and my Uncle Sandy to name three people that I have been thinking about recently.
Next year my Brother will leave home which will change my family again. It could never be the same as it was when I was younger but it breaks my family up even more. What I wouldn’t give to relive one day when I was 15. To see my Dad and Nan again. I miss them more than I could ever put into words. It’s a cliché but they were two of my best friends and I love them.
Those halcyon days of my youth can never be reclaimed or relived and it hurts a lot to think that I will never speak to those influential people again.
Reading about my Uncle Sandy caught me out. I hadn’t realised it had been so long since he died. He was as generous a man as I have met and an example to me of hospitality and family responsibility. He would firmly stand up for what he believed in and I’m sure he pissed few people off but that was part of made him him.
I firmly believe you can learn something from everyone you meet and I think that Sandy taught me a fair bit.
As for me, the last few months have been pretty tough and I think I have been starting to long for home. It’s a comfort to know that I only have six months left. Don’t get me wrong, I am glad I stayed here for two years and I know if I left last summer I would have been disappointed to leave so soon.
This year has been great. I pretty much was the happiest I’ve been for years in May and June and a lot of the thanks for that has to go to Debs. I miss her a lot. So a big thanks to her. In the last year I have been to Korea, Kagoshima, Nagasaki, Hiroshima, Osaka, Kyoto and Nara. Not too bad. Best place visited has to be Kyoto.
My favourite movie of the year was Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King (it came out in February here!). Favourite album would have to be Kleptomania by Mansun, I think, although that’ll probably change tomorrow. Best book is Boy A by Jonothan Trigell.
As I said, this year will see me leave Japan and go home. There is no doubt in my mind about that now. So what else do I hope to achieve/do?
Well firstly I am going to China in March. I am really looking forward that! I am meeting my Mum in Hong Kong – not bad for a big guy fae Leith!!
Secondly I hope to complete another dream of mine when I get home and build my own PC. All going well I should be able to afford to do that.
I also plan to go back to University this year and do my teacher training.
Most importantly for me though is getting home to see my family, especially my Granddad, Brother and Lee. So much has changed in the last year alone. I have several new members of the family to get to know. And a (now not so) little cousin to take out clubbing! Blimey, don’t they realise I’m getting old?
Previous year end articles can be found “here [2003] (2003)”:http://www.andy-thomson.co.uk/textpattern/index.php?id=49 and “here [2004] (2004)”:http://www.andy-thomson.co.uk/textpattern/index.php?id=106